Four Weeks Old and counting.....

Later this evening Finnegan will be four weeks old. I can't believe how fast the time has gone and he's changed so much. Sometimes when I look at him I see the little boy beginning to emerge and it makes we sad because I know he will eventually grow up and go his own way. I know we've got at least 18 years before that happens, but babies change so quickly that we must enjoy every minute of this special time.

I'm starting to feel better and hopefully that means that my anemia is getting better. I don't feel 100% yet and I guess with the 24-hour sleep cycle, I probably won't for a while. Doug however, is getting more sleep and we are trying to get on a schedule in order for him to ease back into the work force. I don't really want him to go back to work because I will miss him.

It's been so nice to have Doug home for this whole month because we have really bonded with each other and with the baby. Doug is such an attentive and loving father. The way that he took care of me for two weeks was really above and beyond the call of duty and it made me fall deeper in love with him. I am so lucky to have such a selfless husband.

A week ago, we had the life insurance discussion and Doug was trying to figure out what we needed in order to take care of Finnegan and I in the event that something happens to Doug. It was so difficult to think about these scenarios especially when I am so happy, it just made me cry to think of life without Doug, or Doug and Finnegan without me. I couldn't possibly imagine a life without them. I waited a very long time to find the right person to marry and I basically hit the jackpot when I met Doug. We've become so close in six years and I would rather spend all of my time with him and Finnegan than anyone else. I don't want to think about eventualities such as these, but at least now we will be prepared in case something does happen.

For more than 100 hours I have held Finnegan in my arms and gazed into his very familiar face and I still wonder, "How did I get so lucky to have such a wonderful little boy?" Then I come back to reality and remember how we wanted him so much that we didn't take "no" for an answer and now we are a family.

Life is good no matter how many diapers we have to change because each one is an affirmation that Finnegan is with us and has changed our lives for the better.